Thursday, June 12, 2008

I Love American Healthcare

So this is pretty dang funny.

And by that, I mean pretty dang funny in a completely excruciatingly horrible way.

I started the morning with the friendly ultrasound tech, who informed me that Baby Boy J is swimming along in an excess of amniotic fluid (just like with Sienna) and is weighing in at a hefty 8 lbs 15 oz. Yeah, that is awesome. There could be a pound differential there, so maybe he's only 8 lbs but he may also be 10. I was super stoked to hear that news.

Then I saw the good doctor who was more than sympathetic to my ordeal. He checked me and discovered that I am 1 1/2 cm dilated which doesn't sound like much but since I've NEVER before dilated on my own, this was a huge accomplishment. And 40% effaced. Again, huge strides for my body.

We high-fived.

Then we talked about everything else that has been going on and he said the magic words I'd been waiting to hear:

"Let's get the baby out!"

He went into the hall to call the hospital while I got dressed and I felt so, so, so relieved.

Until I heard him yelling into the phone.

"You call this patient care? That is the craziest thing I've ever heard of! I want a committee to review this policy right now. I can't tell you how pissed off I am about this!"

Yes, the good doctor said
pissed off.

His voice became hushed again and then he came into the room. And he looked very afraid to tell me what he had to tell me.

"Because you're still in a non-emergent state and the hospital will only allow so many inductions a day, the first available induction date they gave me was....."

JUNE 29th. (That's a mere 17 days from now for anyone keeping track.)

So I started bawling like any hormonal and hugely pregnant woman.

"But after I yelled and pulled some strings they agreed to move that up...."

to JUNE 20th. (That's a mere 8 days away for anyone keeping track.)

Seriously, am I being punk'd here?

I cried and cried while he tried to go over everything with me but I was consumed that this just doesn't make sense to me. The baby is already A. Big. Baby. His abdomen is measuring larger than his head so he's worried about shoulder distoria and if the baby can already fit. Babies at this stage of pregnancy tend to gain a pound a week, making this 8, 9, or 10 lb baby a 9, 10 or 11 lb baby. And I have to wait? Really? Because of policy and procedure at some hospital? And never even mind the cracked pelvis or umbilical hernia. This is insane to me.

So then he says, "do you want to have a c-section?"

And I said no, this is my fourth child and unless it's medically necessary, I don't want to go through an unnecessary surgery. But what's ludicrous about that is that if I agreed to a c-section, he could get me in. More money for the hospital so apparently there willing to make an exception there.

I asked him if he thought I would need a c-section because of his size and he said he felt confident that I could deliver this baby naturally so what is a girl to do? I just can't believe this is the scenario I'm in. I thought I went over every possible outcome last night, what I would say to make him take this baby and this never, ever occurred to me. That I would literally be this close and still 8 days away.

He did strip my membranes and try to poke around as much as possible to get things moving for me on my own, but I have no faith in this body. I know I should think positively but I am beyond deflated. To think that in a week from now I'll still be pregnant is more than I can take. And admitting that makes me feel horrid but it's honestly how I feel.

But there's the update. Believe me, if anything changes, I will let you know.


Kris said...

First off, I'm laughing cuz you are awesome and hilarious and very entertaining. I'm SO SO SO sorry. I hope that the magic of getting your membranes stripped will work. I can't believe that they originally said June 29th! That's TOO far away for sure. That policy sounds so crazy and ridiculous. I can't believe it. I'm so sorry. I'll keep looking at your blog for an update. Good Luck!

Kelly said...

Ooooooh..I'm so furious with your stinkin' hospital.

I have a feeling you will be having your sweet little guy very soon. The membrane thing is gonna help!

Celebrate the end of the school year by taking the fam on a nice slow walk around the neighborhood.

Remember you are loved, Karen! He'll be here very soon- healthy and handsome!

Heather said...


You finally get Dr. T on board and the hospital has to give you fits?

Dr. T is good at battling the hospital- I saw it first hand with Brynner baby. KMC is somethings crazy. I mean these are the people who decided to remodel the NICU ward during prime birthing month (sept)back in 2005.

hatch said...

I keep coming to your blog for an update. That really bites. You never know things could just start happening now. Seriously June 29th that is insane.

lindsay>boo said...

Oh, I'm so sorry Karen! That is completely frustrating. It seems like the overscheduling of inductions is an ongoing problem there. That happened to me too with Chloe. Let's hope you have this baby on your own within the next day or so. You did dilate this time, so wonders never cease.

Sarah said...

Good news that you are dilated and that your doctor helped strip your membranes. Maybe things will start happening on their own soon. At least your doctor stuck up for you and told them that was a stupid policy. I wonder if the person who decided on that has ever been pregnant, swollen and miserable? I'll be crossing my fingers for you.

Ms. Kristen said...

YOu are having that baby tomorrow! If he stripped you...and you are almost to a a ready baby! Start walkin! I feel your pain! My first 2 were 11 days overdue...Hunter came on his due date cus my doctor stripped me! I know it is close for you!

Washington Rimmasch Family said...

Oh man! I can't believe they said the 29th! I have to agree, the whole membrane stripping may be just what you needed especially if you are already dilating on your own. It could happen… My fingers are crossed for you and I will be checking back regularly for updates. Good luck. You look great by the way ;)

Jan said...

And they call these places Health"care". I wonder sometimes.

My heart aches for you right now. I hope that everything will go your way soon. I was 3 weeks late with my first one. I thought I would go crazy. I won't tell his size and length. It will only make it worse.

At least you have been poked at. That might make things go along. Take Care..

debsters said...

I'm loving the vision I have of you high fiving the good DR.

I am a little disturbed at the language he displayed when things didn't go as planned :)

Oh Karen, I'm so sorry this little boy isn't making an appearance quite yet. Park yourself outside in the shade with a great book and a tall beverage. Good Luck...

Marilyn said...

Crum! I am SOOOOOOOOO sorry!

Sara said...

Karen I am so sorry. That seriously sucks. I hope this little guy decides to make a appearance this weekend. I am thinking of you and hope you deliver soon.

Kimberly said...

Hi. I have been reading your blog for a year now and I usually LOL
but this is just TERRIBLE!
I NEVER start on my own. Just those FAKE contractions that do NOTHING! okay~ you can tell, I am feeling your pain.
anyway, here is a loop hole.
It worked for me.
my doctor sent me in to get monitored (with do-nothing-contractions) and then He stopped by to break my water. YAY! then there is no way the nurses can send you home. I think the nurses were a little mad at the doctor, but he paid them off by ordering pizza for them.
I wish you the best. GOOD LUCK!

tharker said...

I like the way Kimberley thinks!

AOlson said...

I keep stopping by to check on you Karen. Hang in there. I think Kimberley's idea is a pretty good one, too. If it's any comfort, Jacob was 10 days "late" according to the doc, who was an idiot, I have since switched. Anyway, the doc told me Jacob was like 10 lbs and way too big for me too deliver so I HAD to have an emergency c-section. Come to find out he was only 6 lbs 9 oz and I could have delivered him just fine on my own. I was majorly ticked off!!!

Terilyn said...

OK first of all: You are so funny! I love reading your blog
Second: The hospital is NOT funny. Stupid red tape insurance blah, blah, blah! I hope when your water breaks you walk in the hospital and leak EVERYWHERE. There's wishen' they'd let you have the baby when you had wanted to.
Good luck, Karen!