Last Friday I got a call from the elementary school principal telling me that she would like me to address the teachers Monday (today) at a meeting, outlining the PTO's goals for the year, etc. No problem, I thought, as I am the Queen of Schmooze. I can talk to just about anyone about just about anything so I hardly gave it a second thought and went on my merry way.
Saturday, after perusing PTO Today magazine (yes, there is such a thing and yes, I do want to poke my own eyeballs out for having read it) I decided I would make a little "Welcome Back Teachers!" treat to hand out. I know, I.AM.STUPID.
Yesterday, I hopped out of bed and got right to work, baking approximately 782 cookies, all the while shooing away my hungry husband and children who didn't seem to get why I was determined to make sure each teacher consumed 12,000 calories at one time. I seriously thought I wouldn't have enough, so I literally morphed into the Cookie Nazi and denied my sweet family any sugary goodness. I hate myself.
Lindsay, who willingly (or perhaps unwillingly because I can be scary) agreed to help me on the PTO board came running to my rescue with trays of brownies and together we put together 40 treat bags. I typed up a schmaltzy little thing and added it to the bags and Voila! I am officially the PTO Pres with the mostest.
Yeah, I know that doesn't rhyme but you'll understand why in a moment....
I fell into bed at 10:38 completely bushwacked from my day as Julia Child's doppleganger, said a quick prayer that my babe would sleep well and drifted off to sleep.
Oh, wait, no I didn't. I didn't drift off to sleep. There was no drifting. In fact, as of 4:31 this morning when I finally got my sorry carcass out of bed, there had been no drifting.
I am driftless.
And quite grumpy, if you really want to know.
In my pre-presidential life, I was a great sleeper. My lovely head could hit the pillow and I would be out in mere seconds. It was a great life, the life of an anytime sleeper. And now, with the weight of the PTO world looming on my shoulders, I am prone to be a mom with a newborn who can't even turn to caffeine to get her through the day. Little man no likey.
Apparently, I am taking my new role just a tad too seriously. I mean, what if I failed and the parents didn't like the assortment of donuts I selected for the Boo Hoo Breakfast? Can you imagine the carnage? The outrage??? The HORROR???
So now it is 5:36 in the morning, and I, the moron without sleep, am going to go work out and pray that any endorphins I amp up might carry me through this very long day.