Tuesday, September 22, 2009

The Unexpected Changes Everything

For the past several days, my husband and I have been trying to figure each other out. We usually walk the same path closely together, one of us occasionally taking the lead, the other happily following, and it's a cycle that has served us well in our marriage. But for the past few days, we've been slightly off. Nothing happened, no argument was had. We just didn't seem to have the time for each other that we're usually so good about making.

All weekend long, we tried for a date. We were aware of our need to reconnect, to have just a few moments alone, but Our Life had other plans. We had extra kids in the house to care for and babysitters were all busy tending others. Instead of getting away, we invited friends in and spent our time laughing and playing, still together, but just slightly apart.

Sunday evening rolled around and we found ourselves looking for the next weekend when we might have the chance to escape on a date. Plans have been made, schedules were filling up, and our evening out seemed like something that might happen sometime around Thanksgiving, if we were lucky. We went to bed, happy to be together and hoping to not drift apart.

Monday morning found me with the usual assault of things to do. Kids off to school, tidying the house, registering Austin for his next surgery (just tubes this time, thankfully) errands to run, laundry to do, etc. etc. I found myself worn out before the day had even begun.

And then I had an idea. The one thing that would make me embrace the day ahead and look forward to it: a date with my husband.

It's funny how making a decision can change everything for the better.

I found my sitter. I sailed through chores. I registered. I laundered. I spent extra time on my hair and makeup. I laid out my clothes. I read to my kids. I did all my errands. I slowly morphed into my happiest me.

When Brad came home, he immediately surrounded himself with our kids and did what he always does upon coming home. Talking with one while wrestling with another while laughing with one more. Getting drinks, helping with homework, finding me for a kiss on the cheek. When he asked me what he could help with for dinner, I looked at him happily and said "Change your clothes! We're going out!"

There are several fantastic things that happen on a Monday night date. First, it almost feels better than a weekend date because it's unexpected. You can slide into a restaurant without waiting. You can arrive at the movies just before it starts because there aren't any lines to contend with. And you can start your week connected to your spouse and feed off the energy that gives you for the whole week ahead.

So we ate. We talked. We laughed and cried at the movie. We connected.

And today, feeling the love of my wonderful husband, I am indeed my most happiest me.

13 comments:

tharker said...

Sounds perfect! So glad you found (made) the time to reconnect.

lindsay>boo said...

Love it! You guys have such a great husband/wife relationship. You really know how to do it right!

Amy said...

I love date night. Seriously, I would die without it. And midweek dates are my favorite for the exact reasons you mentioned. I love not waiting, not dealing with tons of other people. You're so smart to make time for eachother, it makes all the difference.

E said...

<3 Aw.... BTW, What movie did you see?

PRP said...

E- Love Happens. And yes, yes it does. :)

Kelly said...

That sounds divine. This was a great reminder to me that it's time I scheduled a little mid-week date into our lives soon! Not only is it fun, but beneficial too.

Lauren said...

Amazing post! Love it.

Isn't time with the hubby just smashing?

Mimi said...

More than once I have told you that you inspire me and here you have done it again!! I am happy you two had a wonderful date :)

AOlson said...

Wow! Karen you just leave me speachless. You two are awesome. Thanks for the much needed inspiration.

Sarah said...

That is great you could get away for some alone time. Week night dates sound good to me!

SMADF said...

I am soory that your husband cried, I will talk to him.

Brooklet said...

This post inspired me too! I never think of mid-week dates, though I think that might be the best time!

Lisa said...

Brilliant....I am going to do that sometime.....it'll totally catch Donald off guard :)