When I was growing up, I often found myself following my mother around the house and she got ready for a dinner party. She was the Queen of the Dinner Party, always hosting one big event after another, filling our house with good friends, amazing food and stories that I would hide out trying to hear. And I remember her whole process; pouring over her cookbooks to figure out her menu; making lists of what she needed to by and from where; the Deep Clean Of The House; her rearranging furniture, borrowing chairs and finally putting out a spread that would keep the neighbors talking for weeks.
I loved it. And I seemed to have inherited her love of opening her home and feeding the masses.
When I was about ten, I remember her getting out the "good dishes" for her latest Christmas open house. Our good friend and neighbor Marge (who is the mother of this girl) was there helping and as I watched them work, I saw something that made my eyes BULGE out of my head. As my mom took each Crystal goblet down from the shelf, she quickly wiped it clean, with, ahem, her boob.
I know, I know! You're probably thinking horrific things but when I turned to look at Marge, mouth gaping open, I watched her do the same thing.
I know I protested and gawked and told them how grody they were (remember grody? what a great word) but they looked at me and laughed, telling me to stop being such a prude and use what you've got.
If you've ever had the pleasure of meeting my mother, you will know that the Lord gave generously to her, in her lady parts. As He did me. And Marge. And while I was mortified at the time, I seemed to have remembered the experience perfectly.
Fast forward some 25 years, and here I am, wiping things left and right with my chest. Have you ever noticed that a glass can be succinctly wiped down with one swift twist? It can. I know. From experience.
Just today as I was putting a picture in a new frame, I found myself swipe swiping across the front of me. I chuckled as I realized what I was doing and looked up to see the horrified faces of my own daughters.
Your turn will come, sweet girls. Your turn will come.
Of note: My mother is currently in Calgary visiting family and will probably never see this post so let's just keep this between us, ok?