Wednesday, March 21, 2007

Date Night

Last night, Spence and I had a date to the school for Family Book Night which was sponsored by the PTO and gave families the opportunity to make their own books. Spence was STOKED on this idea all day and could not wait to go. He had been thinking about what he wanted to write about (boats) and we made a fun little book together.
But that's not what made the night so fascinating.

When we walked in, I was surprised that there weren't very many people there (um, hellooooo fellow Angelouians, way to support the school....) and we didn't really know anyone so we sat on our own. As I looked around the room, my eyes settled on a familiar face who, OBVIOUSLY had recently had some work done. Not that there's anything wrong with that.

Now, it's not a person I know very well but her daughter and my son were in class together last year and she's a pretty visible person in the school. And don't get me wrong; I'm all for fixing what's broken. My girls will DEFINATELY be put back in place at some point in time. My issue is this: who is the surgeon that thought is was appropriate to take athletic mommy and turn her into a local porn star?
I've always thought that the majority of people looking to improve upon their current features were looking for a subtle change, something natural and not too obvious. Apparently this mommy did not get that memo. Let me illustrate this further...


BEFORE




AFTER


All she needs to do now is change her name to Tawny and get a rose tatooed on her shoulder and she'll be all set.

Because I am once again showing my true colors as a judgemental troll, what will probably end up happening is that when I get my, ahem, problem fixed, it will be a major botch job and I'll end up with a boob coming out of my neck or something but it's a risk I'm willing to take.

Hopefully, things will LITERALLY settle down for this nice woman so she can walk through the halls of the school and not worry why the boys are looking at her so intently.

8 comments:

tharker said...

Okay, the funny is back!!!!!

I love the visual of the mountains!

For purple mountains' majesty...love, love, love it!

Love the song too!

Marilyn said...

This is too weird! This same experience happened to me last night, except that I wasn't at school, I was at enrichment meeting. Seriously! I could not believe my eyes. This person was wearing a very tight shirt, and had OBVIOUSLY had some work done, the worst part was that she was OBVIOUSLY self-concious(sp?) of this fact, and kept putting her arms up to hide her newly LARGE chest.

Brooklet said...

LOL! I loved this post--especially the mountains!! I think that is what the world needs a little more of- porn star moms!

meohmyers said...

Of course I'll keep my eyes peeled at all the women's chests at the school. Those mountain pictures cracked me up!

emahaf said...

I am all for suble changes, I also hope to one day put back certain objects where they belong. But the key is subtle. I loved the mountains.

Heather said...

Love it! I can't wait to post the mountains on my blog someday- but mine will be in reverse.

dandee said...

I agree with Eden, less is more. Now if we could just get society in on this. I love that you thought she should change her name to Tawny. What is it with that name that screams "augmentation"?

Alicia Leppert said...

Oh my gosh, this was sooo funny. Loved the mountains, loved the mental images. Hilarious. I too want to get my flattened balloons re-inflated one day. Not for size, for perkiness.